During these confusing times, it can be hard to find help, much less hope. We face issues today that many never thought they would. How will I get groceries? When will I be allowed to work again? What if I lose my job during a pandemic? What if I get sick? When dealing in the unknown, our minds race with questions we can’t answer. Compound these feelings with the feeling of grief and guilt after an abortion can create unbearable conditions. We will be going over two testimonies from those who have felt the feelings of loss or grief after an abortion and went on to find hope and healing.
What We Do
If you are seeking help, hope, and healing, we have highly trained phone coaches ready to help. H3Helpline is here to help with anyone suffering from feelings of loss and grief after an abortion. Whether you want to just talk with someone or just have someone listen to your thoughts and concerns, we are here to help. We are a national helpline that operates 24/7. If desired, after our call we can check in on you in a few days. For those dealing with post-abortion stress syndrome, we can also send information about local support groups in your area.
Hope That Has Been Found
The following testimonials are displayed on our stories page.
Shared by Sue
Never in my wildest dreams did I envision myself there, in the women’s center, under those circumstances. I was told that my “pregnancy tissue” would be removed during a short procedure, and after a time of recovery, I would be on my way.
That one tragic day dramatically altered my life, sending me into a longstanding downward spiral.
Years, later, it took an unexpected encounter with a complete stranger to unearth and bring into the light the part of my life that I had tried so very hard to hide, bury, and forget.
I was an 18-year-old freshman in college when my boyfriend of two years and I suddenly found ourselves faced with an unplanned pregnancy. I did not know where to turn. My parents had just traumatically separated. Feeling shame and fearing rejection, I didn’t confide in any friends. My boyfriend and I had just started college and had no money to support a baby. In a panic, we felt the only foreseeable option was abortion.
My abortion occurred on December 17, 1980. That day is forever etched in my mind. I remember being very fearful and anxious. The procedure was painful both physically and emotionally.
My immediate reaction after the procedure was one of relief. The procedure was over. My crisis had passed. I could continue school. No one would know.
However, feelings of guilt, shame, emptiness, and depression came soon after. These feelings were too much to bear, so I stuffed all my painful emotions into a box, tightly shut the lid, walked it down into the dark cellar of my heart, shoved it in a far corner, turned the latch on the door, and threw away the key.
The pressure of keeping the lid on the box was great. Sadly, for the next seven years, I found myself immersed in the party scene, using alcohol to dull my pain. But praise God, in October of 1987, Jesus Christ saved my life! A few years after I received Jesus, He began to lead me by the hand to that locked cellar door.
He began to orchestrate experiences that would reveal to me my need for healing.
One such experience occurred while driving home from a Wednesday night Bible study. I drove past a stumbling figure walking in the darkness along the side of the road. I felt a strong urge to go back. It was a woman, noticeably drunk, who agreed she could use a ride home.
When we arrived at her home, she invited me in. For the next two hours, this woman sat in a crumpled heap, sobbing over the death of her 29-year-old son. She also confessed that she had an abortion earlier in life and wondered if her son’s death was God’s punishment for her abortion.
At that moment, the lid to my tightly closed box blew off as the reality of my abortion and the loss of my child became painfully real. The woman and I wept together bitterly.
I later shared my abortion history with my pastor, and his daughter subsequently referred me to an abortion recovery Bible study support group. Through this ministry, God mended my heart piece by piece. The women in my group became “Jesus in the flesh” to me. They loved me, cried tears with me, and offered God’s words of truth and hope.
One of the topics addressed in the final weeks of the Bible study was “Accepting the Loss and Letting Go.” The leaders suggested that we prayerfully name our children. Several days later, I was praying on my bed at night about a topic unrelated to my abortion. Suddenly, in my mind’s eye, I saw the image of a beautiful, blonde, curly-haired, blue-eyed boy running to me. With bright shining eyes he said, “Mommy, I love you.” Through tearful sobs, I told him I loved him too. As I held him, I asked, “Do you forgive me?” He said, “Of course I do, Mommy. I love you. I’ll see you in heaven.”
Immediately, the name “Stephen” dropped into my heart, along with immense comfort and peace. I asked God to confirm his name. Over the next few weeks, He did!
The first confirmation came when I was in a post office standing in line behind a woman holding her beautiful blue-eyed baby boy. I felt the nudging of God to ask the woman her baby’s name. She replied, “Stephen.”
The second confirmation came at the close of a church conference on the topic of “The Lord’s Mercy.”
Everyone had left the church except for myself and a woman nursing her baby. I felt the nudge of God to ask the mother for her baby’s name. She replied, “Stephen.”
The third confirmation came when I was sitting alone at a park. I was watching a father strolling hand in hand through sun-drenched grass with his young curly-haired son. As they turned to walk past me, I again felt God say, “Ask him his son’s name.” The man replied, “Stephen.”
I was amazed! God not only confirmed Steven’s name; He also confirmed time and time again that He really cared about me and was divinely orchestrating every moment of my healing!
At the final meeting of the Bible study support group, we held a memorial service for our children. We planted a tree to symbolize that despite our children’s tragic deaths, God could still create new life and new beginnings in us.
It was at that moment while holding hands in a circle around our newly planted tree, I realized that the box that had been hidden in the cellar of my heart for ten years was now standing open in the light of day. It was empty! My heart had been mended and given wings to fly!
Within a few short years, God brought another Steven into my life, who later became my husband. We are blessed with two amazing sons, who love God with all of their hearts. God, in His amazing grace, has completely healed and restored me.
I share this story to honor the life of my precious son, Stephen, whom I’ll see one day in heaven; in the hopes of powerfully discouraging others from ever making the tragic choice I made; and to give honor and glory to God who saved me, and brought me to wholeness.
To those hurting after abortion — you are not alone. God can bring hope and healing to your heart, so that you too will know, “If the Son sets you free, you are free indeed!”
Shared by an Anonymous H3Helpline Caller
“I, myself, have received help, healing, and hope after I had an abortion. My story starts with a family broken by divorce, then sexual abuse by a family member and later, by several adult men. My mother remarried to a man who was a drug addict. I did not understand boundaries or healthy relationships and these things led to my promiscuity as a young teenager.
I was 15 years old when I got pregnant by my boyfriend. For a while, I thought we would get married and be a family and I secretly prayed for that but didn’t really even know who God was. I did not know it at the time but he was an alcoholic. When his mother found out, she pressured me to get an abortion saying. ‘I was too young to be a mom’. He continued to drink and cheated on me. How could the person who was supposed to love me, hurt me so badly? My heart was reeling with lies whispered by the deceiver, so I made an appointment with an abortion clinic thinking it would “take care of my problem”. Once there, I should have ran out but instead, I walked into the exam room where they inserted a cervical dilator and said to come back the next day. I was so distraught, what had I done? How did I get here?? I went home and told my mom that I was getting an abortion. My mother told me not to do it. I started crying and called my Obstetrician to ask about the cervical dilator? She told me that the odds were now extremely high that I would miscarry because of the dilator. Through my tears, I told my mom that I felt I had no choice but to do it. She told me to not come back home if I did, so I left. My boyfriend who was supposed to ‘be there for me’ went out and got drunk again, so a friend took me back. It all seemed like a bad dream, but unfortunately, it was all too real. At the clinic, it was so cold and austere—I started crying again. I really did not want to do it. I just wanted someone to tell me I would be okay and the baby would be okay. That I could handle this… my mom had done that, but again the lies were swirling around in my head. The nurse told me to put a gown on and to lay on the exam table.
The two things I will never forget about the abortion:
- The extremely sharp pains I felt as my baby was dismembered and his life taken from me —I cried and told them to stop but they wouldn’t.
- The horrible sucking noise of the vacuum machine.
Eventually, I stumbled out to the waiting room. The staff quickly grabbed me and told me sternly to go to the back of the clinic to get picked up! I was dazed and in pain and left with an antibiotic in my hand and my heartbroken. I was completely drained — emotionally and physically and later on I realized, spiritually, too. Because I was still in the dark, a friend later took me to Planned Parenthood for birth control pills. They gave me a year’s worth of pills (without disclosing the risks of the pill or how being abstinent could have really helped me). I drank alcohol and did drugs to numb myself out. I tried to tell myself that it was okay, but I knew deep down, it was not okay — I was not okay. Physically, I worried if I would ever be able to have children? Emotionally, I felt such guilt and regret. Spiritually, I felt so ashamed that I thought God would never forgive me.
At 19, I became pregnant again and although the father was an abusive alcoholic, I decided to raise the baby. I was determined to never have another abortion — not ever again. And while being a young single mother was not easy, I knew I had made the right decision this time — one I would never regret!
My journey to healing began about 20 years ago. I had met a young man and we fell in love. I prayed to God that this man would become my husband. God answered that prayer! My future husband and I started going to church, where he accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior, got baptized and then we got married in the church! He is a great dad to my baby girl (who’s now an adult and married with a child of her own)! We have been blessed with two additional beautiful children! As our faith journey has progressed, I have received healing and hope through Bible study, prayer and attending an abortion recovery retreat. I was able to honor the memory of my son and receive true forgiveness and healing from the Lord! My favorite verse is Philippians 4:13 Open in Logos Bible Software (if available), “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” If abortion is in your past, the same love and forgiveness found in Jesus Christ is available to you! Don’t wait another minute believing the lies! H3Helpline is ready and able to help you with.”
Get The Support You Need
It is never too late to reach out for help, but that doesn’t mean you should put off healing. To reach out for help is easier said than done, but will never be regretted. We believe that everyone should have access to help, hope, and healing. Finding help can lead to healing and a life full of joy and light. Call us today at 866-721-7881 or visit us online to learn more about our services and how we can help you. We’d love to talk with you.
How You Can Help
If you find yourself being called to help us in our cause, there are currently three ways you can provide help. The first is donations. If you are able to help financially. you can visit our site and make a donation that will help fund current and future services. The second is volunteering your time. We are currently looking for those who would like to help with social media outreach, becoming a phone coach, and fundraising. The third and most important is prayer. We ask that you simply lift us and all those struggling with post-abortion stress syndrome and anyone struggling with anxiety and depression. To learn more about our mission and how you can get involved, click here.